On The Verge

With the absences I've gone through, I am compelled to comply my blogging hiatus. It was with worthy reasons that I deserted you in good health. Having been nitty-gritty with my real life, some school works, and other more serious businesses dignified my much-been-long-forgotten here in the blogspot. I feel no relief from being away with this writing stuff and I feel sorry for that. I will make it up to you.

So I have to start this with 'How are you?' line. It's been long weeks that we've been in distant margins that I have to query again with everyone else condition and opinion. To start this op-ed posting of informnations I again appeal to you to read this with sincerity as my reputation slowly die for showing here my scandalous lifestyle. However I am risking my health if I won't let it have here. So bear with me.

Speaking of health, I may soon be at risk for having been indulged to this smoking habit and as each day passes, I'm getting engrossed by the fact that sooner than what I've expected I'll be damned with cancer and whatever fucking disease that would nail me to death.

My preferred brand

As each time I light a cigarette I always think of the horrendous things that may come if I continue with this smoking shitty habit. But I find within a satisfaction everytime I smoke, and maybe my being used to it has been a major factor for neglecting the adversities of it. However everytime I realise my life is already at stake because I lighted a single cigarette, then I become more anxious about this dirty habit. And having already one of the side effects of smoking(I have a cough right now) makes me more anxious than ever.

The reasons why I smoke:
#1. I smoke because I want to get tough from whatever is taken or given, depending on what pissed me or calmed me.


#2. I smoke because I have to get in to the program. If my friends does it, so as I(Don't get me used to it, I won't die soon).


#3. I feel good smoking after eating, it settles the food in my stomach.


#4. (I hate this reason) Somehow I want to shorten my life. I want to die sooner than getting old. I wouldn't mind being a geriatric patient, that's all.


I have to clear this right now, about non-smokers who stereotype the smokers as liberated stonehead kind of people who do nothing but destroy other people's lives and they themselves. This preposition really freaked me. My ears reddened when I heard them saying while pointing their fingers straight at me.

I don't smoke because I'm liberated of sort. Fuck it!

...

Here are the side effects of smoking. Shit I'm cracked here.

I've been thinking of quitting since the day I started smoking and it gets more tough to get rid from it as I get much indulged from doing it more often. So sad for me to say that as I also get involved to it longer the harder I can't get away from it.


So this is my official badge in my campaign to a zero-smoke zone.

Someday I will be a smoke-free, believe me.

I have to display this post so as to warn everyone what the smokers have been through in their struggle from this soulless smoking activity. And for whatever form, I am disappointed for what I've been into because this had been my greatest reputational disgrace.

This had been a weapon of mass destruction and it is killing us softly. We have to respond to this.

For those who are planning to smoke and hang around with the smokers, never even think of it. Never imitate my unclean habit and never get used to it. But whatever is, I feel no great remorse from it, only that, it's destroying my body, reputation... my whole life.


For those of you who have read this and yet keep on smoking, Fuck you!